YIPPPEEEEE!

I just received an e mail that Sarah Jean is coming for a visit!!!!! YEEEEEEHAAAAAA!

I am so excited that she will be here! So much to do.... so much to get ready...painting, cleaning, getting a bed ready for her since she cannot stand my snoring, the list goes on and on!

Sarah Jean and I have been friends since the 5th grade. We have done all kinds of crazy things together. We once dressed up like sluts and walked 3 blocks from my house to hers in broad daylight and thought (at the ripe old age of 12) that we were hot stuff.

We were friends all through high school and into college, but both did our own things, too. We drifted apart and back together again more times than I care to count, but our friendship has remained strong and true and I am more glad to know her today than ever; and I hope she feels the same.

***FUNNY STORY***

Sarah and I shared an apartment together for a year during college. We used to sit up late and talk and smoke cigarettes and drink beer. We would rush home from school/work to see each other and take turns cooking meals and doing chores. It was a great time! I was engaged to be married at the time and my fiance joined the army. Sarah often slept in my room because we would just fall asleep talking. One morning my alarm went off and since I was then, and always will be slow to wake up in the morning, I pushed the snooze. Three times. The fourth time, Sarah had had enough of it and yelled at me to "GET YOUR FAT ASS OUT OF BED!!!!!" I did, of course, but not without cursing under my breath something about it being my damn bed. We still laugh about it to this day.

Well, that fiance came and went, but Sarah stayed. She has supported me through two marriages, one divorce, multiple hospital events involving my grandmother, dad, Lula and even myself. She was in the room with me and my family when my dad died. She is like a sister to me and when I moved away from Michigan, leaving her was paramount to leaving Trixie.

So it should be clear that a visit from her will be a tremendous thrill and I am so looking forward to staying up late, laughing, and reminiscing. The cigarettes will be replaced with the chocolate dessert of her choice and the beer with a good white wine, but the conversation and the bond of friendship that will remain will be rich and satisfying, indeed.

What Am I Going To Do With That Boy?

I think the only thing I can do is pray. I pray that I can get that boy to the age of 2. When we get there, I'll pray for 3.

This child is absolutely fearless.

He has a bruise on his face from I don't even know what. He has a black eye from trying to climb on top of three paint cans that were stacked into a pyramid. Paint cans don't hold climbing babies. He has multiple scratches and scabs on his head in various places from all the falls and misjudgments made by new walkers.

I've been thinking of changing his name from LG to Chunky Monkey.

He would scale the entire house if I gave him the opportunity! I cannot keep him off of my kitchen table unless I take all the chairs and turn them over, legs up in the air. The fireplace is a continuous struggle as well; I have taken to piling toy bins up there so he doesn't have a square inch to occupy his chunky butt. The stairs are his Mecca.

But the worst is...the ladder.

I have been trying to remodel our entry hall (among other things) and need our ladder to complete the work. I have pulled him off the ladder many times, but usually I am right behind him, so it's no big deal. Yesterday he upped the annti.

I had the ladder in place and he was in the family room adjacent to the entry hall. I had a baricade constructed of a toy bin and Lula's art easel turned on its side, which had seemed to be effective at keeping him in the family room for the last thirty minutes. I needed to stop working on the entry to fix lunch, so I went to wash my hands in the nearby bathroom. I proceeded straight to the bathroom, washed and dried my hands efficiently, and immediately headed back toward the entry.

Then I saw him....on TOP of the six foot ladder!!! As if that weren't bad enough, he was holding the scissors I had been using to trim joint tape! I think my heart skipped a beat!

My first instinct was to run toward him and scoop him up into my arms, thereby snatching him from the dangerous fall that seemed imminent; but if you know anything about LG, you know that would have been a mistake. Surely he would have taken great joy in my obviuos panic and started bouncing up and down frantically---all the while squealing delightedly. This would have caused him to lose his balance and tumble to the ground at the speed of light cracking his head on every rung of the ladder on the way down and impaling himself with the scissors before I could take two steps.(Ok, so I'm a little dramatic...I was scared!) So I fought the urge and quietly. calmly. proceeded. SLOWLY. I tried not to make eye contact with him and to cover as much ground with the fewest steps possible before he figured out that I was moving.

I rescued my little daredevil successfully this time, but if that bathroom had been any further away from the ladder the story could have been very different. He would have seen me coming and attempted either a quick getaway or a happy dance, both of which would have probably resulted in a 911 call.

Chunky Monkey it is.

So Much To Write, So Little Time

I still haven't posted about our fall break and the weekend is almost here again, which means there will be another visit from CJ. Not to mention all the Halloween hub-ub will be starting Sunday with a Trunk-R-Treat event at church. I could go into a rant right now about all the money I spent at Wal-Mart yesterday for upcoming Halloween events...I'll save it for later.

Ok, so the short and sweet of it is that we took two road trips. The kids were FANTASTIC! Lula Belle has figured out that if she sleeps, the time goes faster! LG, not so much. He does however, enjoy the DVD player, so he got his weekly allotment of television all wrapped up on the drives.

Our first trip was to CJ's grandmother's house. We had a great time visiting, eating great grandma food (yeah, you know the stuff) and went to a terrific place called Leonardo's in Enid, Oklahoma. If you ever get to Enid and have kids with you, FIND IT! It was packed with fun and educational activities for kids of all ages ranging from a music room to an actual jet plane cockpit for the kids to explore. There was also an area that is gated in for young ones to roam and have fun. LG discovered Thomas the Train and since the child has never focused on anything that is not dangerous before that, he is getting a Thomas table for Christmas. So, Trixie, any Thomas stuff you want to unload for a fair and reasonable price, I'm in.


Our second trip was to Little Rock, Arkansas to see CJ's mom and stepdad. That was a fun trip also filled with baking, more eating, s'mores, wagon rides and lots of snuggle time with the Little Rockers (by the kids, not me).


So all in all, a good time was had, the week flew by and I and my children survived fall break without a single incident of evil mommy syndrome attacking us. And now, I have to go get Lula ready for school and guess what! LG starts a Mother's Day Out program tomorrow...I bet you can almost see me jumping up and down! I could do lots of things on my very first day alone in oh, I don't know how long, but Mama needs a new pair of jeans! It'll be so fun -and foreign- to shop without a 26 pound weight on my left hip!

Ladies and Gentlemen...

I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine that has recently started her own blog!

My friend "Chelle" goes to my church and leads my small group bible study and knits with me on occassion. Somewhere in all that she discovered that I like to blog. Well, apparently I have inspired her to add one more thing to her very busy life! (She smiles deviously)

So, please go check her out at "My Life on the Ledge" (sorry, but I can't insert the link for some reason today...you can follow it from my "Frequently Funny" category to the left)and leave her a comment that you were there! We all need a little love when we're getting started, right?

HMMMMMM...

I talked to my mother on the way home from the in-law's today.

Nonnie: We witnessed a biker get hit by a car yesterday.

Me: Oh, mom! That's awful! Was he ok?

Nonnie: Well, it was a good thing our friend Bob was with us. He knew just what to do. He's trained in that sort of thing.

Me: Oh, yeah? What does he do for a living?

Nonnie: He runs a brake repair shop.

Me: Huh?

Nonnie: And he gives blood once a month, too!

HMMMMM.So did he stay at a Holiday Inn last night?

Happy Saturday!

WOW!!! I feel fantastic!

I was watching Veggie Tales with Lula Belle last night at 8 pm...I was falling asleep. So, I decided to go ahead and go to bed at 8:30 when she did.

It is 8:35 AM right now and I am just having my first cup of coffee!!!

12 hours of sleep in mommyland...what is that about???!!!??

Of course, LG got up three times somewhere in there, but even so, I got lots of sleep! Yippppeeeee!

It is supposed to be a beautiful day here, so we are going to have breakfast and be off to scour the city for a camera battery charger and a craft show and top it all off with the park. I hope you a super day, too!

Boys Will Be Boys?

I am not a bad mother. I am not a bad mother. I am not a bad mother.

I will believe it eventually if I keep chanting, right?

LG is walking now. He still crawls when the mood strikes, he gets really tired, or if he decides that the urgency of a sippy cup is such that he could not possibly walk to the outstretched hand holding it quickly enough.

My adventure with a boy child has begun. He is notably more daring than Lula Belle.

Already he has scaled the stairs 962 times, the fireplace bookshelf 3 times, the kitchen table (and reaching for the chandelier to dangle from it) 7 times, climbed across my couch side tables and attempted the washing machine twice. All of this with absolutely no fear or comprehension of the danger he has put himself in. When I come running at him to save him from a fall that I am sure would result in a trip to the emergency room, he just opens his mouth wide and lets out a loud squeal of delight and sometimes begins bouncing wildly with amusement. This makes me run faster, and he in turn laughs hysterically.

This child is innately more curious than Lula Belle, too.

He is banned from all bathrooms because I grew tired of sterilizing him from head to toe after he had drenched himself with toilet water. He will get into any drawer that is left even slightly ajar and pull out all off its contents for close examination. He has been sternly corrected about getting into cupboards and removing everything in them only to giggle, tilt his head sideways and look up at me through the corners of his eyes to avoid further punishment ( it usually works, too).

"Well, this is normal", you say. "This is just an inquisitive little boy being a boy", you say. "You are not a bad mother", you say.

Do good mothers let their children dangle from a chandelier and eat Ajax with bleach all in the span of 5 minutes?

See. Told you I was a bad mother.

It all began very innocently. Next week is fall break, so instead of hanging around the house with nothing to so for a week I decided to take the kids on a couple road trips. I thought I'd go over to CJ's grandma's house and later in the week to his mom's. I had already contacted my mom-in-law, so I was e mailing CJ's grandma to see if we could come over. I wanted to compose a short email. During the time it took me (I'm an average typist)to write two lines, LG climbed up a chair, onto the table and decided the chandelier was indeed, a swing. I looked up from typing to see this and proceeded to bolt across the family room to the breakfast nook just in time to save him from a five foot drop onto the ceramic tile.

He laughed uncontrollably at my breathlessness and exasperation! How dare he?!

I gently placed him in front of his favorite Barney electronic gizmo(a just-kill-me now toy) and told him to play for just a minute and went back to my e mail.

I no sooner sat down to finish my thought and I heard something fall onto the tile floor. I knew he was probably into the cabinet but heck, he'd already pulled out that tin foil 14 times today; one more won't hurt, right? So I finished two more lines, pressed send and went to the kitchen to reorganize my baking needs...yet again.

EXCEPT it wasn't my baking drawer this time. The child had half the contents of my under sink cabinet out onto the floor and was wearing what appeared to be a powdered sugar go-tee.

"Do I keep powdered sugar under there", I frantically wondered? No, I most certainly don't.

In a rush of panic I scooped him up, stared at his face and did what every mother does when she doesn't know what is on her child's face/hands. I tasted it! Yep, tried it out and quickly concluded it was most definitely NOT powdered sugar. (Unless they have recently and without my knowledge, changed powdered sugar to taste like chalky bleach.)AJAX!!!!!!

So, I quickly called the poison control line and with all the coolness I could muster, admitted to the man who answered that I had allowed my 14 month old to ingest a lethal substance. The man gently inquired about how much, when and if there was vomiting or coughing. I answered all his questions honestly, all the while praying he wouldn't ask for my name. He did. Luckily he only wanted my first name. He told me to give the boy some milk and crackers an keep him upright for an hour, then call him back. I did all that he told me to do and LG is just fine, you'll be pleased to know.

I, however, will remain convinced that I am doomed to mommy purgatory for my poor baby's mishap unless God and all of you let me know that Boys will be boys.

I'll be waiting, but I promise to install a lock on the cabinet before the day is done and to watch the little stinker more carefully until I hear back.

Catching Up

I haven't posted in several days because I have a very bad habit of staying up too late when CJ is gone. I find myself up until midnight or later watching all my favorite television shows and knitting, but that late at night I don't feel intelligent enough to gather my thoughts into posting. So, I wait to post until I have gotten up before the kids or while Lula is at school and LG is napping. I have stayed up way too late to get up early lately and I have used all my available nap times to try to get our master bathroom somewhat in shape for CJ to get home on Friday. It is "tore up from the floor up" and I had hoped that he wouldn't have to come home to it like that...but he does. There is no way I will get it done before he gets home. Oh, well. It will be beautiful by the time he makes his next trip back!


We had a nice weekend. Friday night we went to the corn maze with our church groups and the kids had a blast roasting hot dogs and marshmallows for s'mores, playing on the hay bales and in the corn box and just generally running around with all their friends. By the time we got done with all of that it was dark and since I was scarred for life by "Children of the Corn" in the 7th grade, I was way too freaked out to take them through the actual corn maze in blackness so we skipped that part.




I decided I needed a break from the house and maybe even the kids, so I called my mom-in-law and asked if we could come to The Gardeners'Farm for the day on Saturday. She of course said yes, so we made the 1-1/2 hour drive and spent the afternoon playing, digging peanuts, picking corn, touring the gardens, feeding pigs and observing all the wildlife around.



I didn't get much of a break from the kids, but it was nice to get away from the mess of the remodeling and it was so much fun to watch the kids enjoy the farm and grandma and grandpa! By the time we got home, the kids were ready for bed and I stayed up late watching tv and knitting a special project that I will reveal very soon.


Sunday was busy with church and helping to get ready for our annual Harvest Moon Festival (a big craft show), which is coming up on Saturday. Then our week began and here it is Wednesday already! We have a busy day today and tomorrow and then CJ will be home on Friday.

Our weekend will consist of Chuck E cheese, the State Fair, Harvest Moon, church and somewhere in there I am bound and determined to either go get a pedicure or take a long nap...ALONE... to maintain my sanity and gear up for another three week stretch without CJ. I'll let you know how it all works out.

Where, Oh Where Can Trixie Stix Be?

CJ called me last night and was quite upset.

"What do I have to do to get her to post? The keyboard arrived last week and she had the weekend! I thought for sure she would have written something by now!"

So, Trixie, if you read this...my peeping, lurking husband is really missing you; as are myself and all your other readers! I know you have a lot going on, but if you don't post soon, I fear may have to take drastic actions to calm my husband!

I may have to get him to actually post a comment! AAAGGGHHHHH!