Yellowstone National Park is a True Treasure

A trip to Yellowstone National Park. I remember begging my parents to take us there, yet had no idea why thy would not comply.

Now I know.

It is expensive. Really expensive.

$50 to get into the park, $60 to eat lunch and dinner, $37 for souveniers and gifts at three different gift stores (four year old is very adept at begging), $149 for hotel room that was unavoidable when the traveling day became longer than Lula and LG could handle, $73 for more meals the second day and $59 to fill back up with gas before heading home.

Views of Yellowstone with our kids' great grandmother along, family bonding time, various geysers, elk, buffalo, several types of water foul, and my personal favorite-a bald eagle....Priceless.

I know, I know. It is a cheesy repeat of a very over used marketing slogan, but the reason it got to be over used is because there is so much truth in its principal! I could never express in words the beauty and grandure of this place! I will cherish the memories made the last two days for as long as I live!

There are a few things that I am really hoping will result from this trip:

1) that it helped to teach Lula that the wonderous gifts that God has given us are plentiful and fragile all at the same time. We must practice good habits to keep our Earth as clean and safe as we can.

2) that seeing these gorgeous animals in their natural habitat has given her an appreciation for the delicate balance of the circle of life.

3) that Lula can go to school and while learning about Yellowstone, proudly say that she was there and saw how beautiful and special it is, that she learned things like how a geyser works and that some forest fires are beneficial, and that she got to go with her great grandma.

If those things happen to any degree, I will feel that the money we spent was some of the best ever! If you haven't been to this remarkable place...

Go. Now.

Enough said.

Sunshine

If you are reading my blog, you have probably been directed here via http://www.trixies-stix.blogspot.com. Thanks for stopping by. I must say I have a disclaimer of my own...

Gosh. To anyone else it probably seems like Trixie and I cannot blow enough "Sunshine" up each other's %&#es! Our blogs are filled with so many compliments that it occurs to me that it may be slightly nauseating for some!

In our defense, can I just say that we are at a point in our lives where these seemingly over abundant gratuities, expressions of love and general feelings of appreciation are finally able to be out in the open. We have spent most of our lives at an emotional distance. It feels really good to be comfortable enough with Trixie to let her know what I have always felt for her, but had difficulty for one reason or another articulating in a meaningful way.

So, thanks to all of you for enduring our long overdue sisterly love. It may appear to be too much but I assure you, it is by no means enough yet. Not on my behalf, anyway. Regardless, I'll try to reel it in a bit so as not to make any of you toss your cookies.

And thanks to Trixie for her compliments regarding my behavior in Arizona. I am definitely a person who tends to beat herself up about things and I have been doing plenty of it. I wish I could do some things differently and that my mom and her "friend" Fred could understand the reason for my overwhelming need to try to exert control throughout the week of my mother's hospitalization.

What must have appeared malicious to Fred was actually my attempt (albeit a poor one) to maintain some degree of a feeling of my mom, sister and myself as a family unit. Since our dad died our mom has grown increasingly distant; and witnessing Fred taking a "spousal role" with her in such a delicate and life threatening situation often made me physically ill and unable to draw breath for missing my dad so much.

My senses were raw. I felt like every time Fred did something kind for mom that I would like to have pushed him away from her to somehow protect our family turf. It is silly, I know. Yet somehow, I was acutely aware of every tiny thing that in any other situation would have been benign and completely unoffensive.

By Wednesday we were barely speaking; for what I am sure he thought was a blatant attack on his role in my mother's life. I know that he felt like I was trying to control things to push him away from me and my mother, but really all I was doing was wishing so badly that he were my dad there stroking my mom's hair that I became more angry than I have ever been about dad's death. This made me seem cold and even punishing to him, but honestly that is not what I intended. I was simply in a place of grief that in the three years since my dad passed I had not been in yet.

Now don't get me wrong, I feel like I still have plenty to be angry at Fred and my mom about; things I won't go into now and especially in light of his behavior that week. He didn't even try to consider what might be driving my behavior, but instead responded with cruelty of his own. Still, I accept responsibility for my own less than desirable behavior and will try to make amends. I'm not sure how yet, but it will come to me.

For now though I will relish in the "sunshine" that Trixie and I have begun to spread around and allow that to assuage my grief.

Casting Out My Line

Hello. I am JJ nd my life is seemingly in a constant state of flux. My husband, CJ is an engineer and works in oil and gas and therefore is changing job locations every few years to be present for the construction of the equipment he designs at various oil refineries throughout the U.S.. Our home base is in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and although we maintain a residence there, we are currently in Montana.

We have two children; Lula Belle, age four and LG, age 11 months.

I am hopeful that I can make some fun and meaningful contacts with other mothers out there who love to read, watch movies, knit, craft, or otherwise have a good time with their lives.

My sister has a blog called Trixie's Stix http://www.trixies-stix.blogspot.com/(check it out...she is a hoot!) and she is the one who prompted me to start blogging. I was only semi-excited about it until I actually posted as a guest blogger for her and found that it was really exciting to get comments back on my post. I think I am about to bite...

Hook. Line. Sinker.

Hope to see you out there in the land of cyberspace!

Sleepless in Montana

I was scared. I was really, really scared.

My sweet boy. The boy who never likes to see anyone eat alone. A very "healthy" 11 month old boy (he weighs 23, yeah you heard me, 23 pounds). A boy who gets up on average of twice a night to eat a full 8 ounce bottle.

(Cue horror music here)

No food or drink after midnight.

Yep, I had to get my ordinarily famished young fellow to the hospital for 7 am surgery to put tubes in his ears without feeding him since midnight!!!!

How in the world was I going to do that? The child would surely be screaming those blood curdling howls that make a mother go absolutely batty and want to crawl right out of her own skin. He would be in complete agony. The kind of terrible fit that makes the child have chest heaves when he finally stops crying.

I had known that the tympanostomy was coming and had been dreading this starvation ritual more than the procedure itself by tenfold! I knew the procedure is routine and no one in our family has ever had any complications from anesthesia, so I was ok with it. But ask me to keep food from my child and I dive into the throws of anxiety faster than you can say "BOO"!

I must have woken every hour or so to check the time. I did not want to be late and have to go through this ordeal again. I got up at 11:30 and fed him a bottle so full of rice cereal that I had to clip a nipple to get it to flow through!

Well, LG is typically a very happy boy. He's the kind of baby everyone stares at and then is overjoyed by his reaction...a coy little head tilt and big, teeth-half-in grin. He's so good tempered, that often I have not even known he's had an ear infection until I took him in for a well baby visit. No fever, no crying, no fussiness, and getting up in the night is no clue, as I have explained.

I should have known. I had absolutely nothing to worry about.

He ate his bottle at 11:30. He woke up at 4 am. If I had fed him, he would have gone back to sleep, but since I couldn't...he wanted to play. He cooed and giggled and played like the best boy until 5:30 when we left for hospital. We got within 5 minutes of arriving and he fell asleep! He remained calm all throughout the registration and pre-op and waved goodbye with a smile on his face as the nurse carried my sweet boy off to have the deepest sleep of his short life!

He woke up mad as a hornet, though! Who could blame the little guy? He could hear every sound for the first time ever probably, which must have made the world sound like a freight train two feet away. He was drunk from the anesthesia and although he'll probably have a period in college where he'll deliberately try to make himself feel this way, now is not the time!

As soon as I took him from the nurse though, and gave him his bottle...my sweet boy was back. He ate his bottle while I did the discharge paperwork and we happily went on home.

I thought maybe he might sleep through the night last night since he probably wouldn't wake with ear pain and decide he may as well eat while he's up.

Oh, well. I can't have everything.